The Art of Getting Over a Break-Up (Part 2)

As we mentioned in Part 1 of this article, Dealing with a Break-up, shock and denial are normal reactions in the process of getting over a break-up; however, the sooner the next stage sets in, the sooner you'll be able to recover your emotional freedom and your capacity to love.

This next stage in the process of getting over a break-up consist of...

Accepting the Break-Up: you are now ready to accept the reality of the break-up. This allows for less explosive and more stable emotions, and a more realistic approach to your situation and options.

Author TW Jackson explains in one of his videos (see link below - you may have to
scroll down), how agreeing with the break-up is the first step in making up with your ex.

The Magic of Making Up: Getting Over a Break-up

Mr. Jackson calls it 'the 1st move', alluding to the fact that it's a must-do if you want to
get back with your ex. Whether this is your goal or you still don't know, acceptance is
the doorway to getting over a break-up.

This important stage of acceptance is sometimes delayed by our trying to fully understand
what happened. During the prior stages of shock and denial, our view was tainted by
our feelings (blame, anger, self-doubt), so if we tried too hard to understand the why's
and how's of what happened, our conclusions would have been warped, and true acceptance delayed.

• But now that you've begun to really accept what's going on, understanding
  what and how it happened is of utmost importance for getting over the
  break-up.

Why? Because understanding will enhance your view of the relationship, which will in
turn give you the chance of working on things which, had they been noticed and addressed before the break-up, would have helped the relationship evolve differently.

(If you're looking for more information on preventing a break-up, you can start by reading
our article, Relationship Break-Up Advice: Before It's Too Late).

If you’ve noticed, talking about the subject of breaking up is very similar to how we would 
talk about an illness. That’s because getting over a break-up very much feels like recovering 
from an illness. There are symptoms (sorrow, grief, anger), that are inevitable as this 'illness' progresses and follows its course. At the beginning we’re weak, scared and confused. But if
we hang in there, get some good medicine (relationship advice, coaching, counseling), and
take good care of ourselves, we can recover.

Even more than recover! If we go at it with the right tools, we can bounce back smarter and stronger through experience and learning, and we'll become more artistic in the way we'll
handle our relationships in the future.

So, as the process of dealing with the break-up continues to evolve, you acquire more
freedom and better understanding of how you feel, and what to do, if anything, with those feelings. And the better you can understand what really happened, how and why, the
stronger you’ll come out of the situation.

Now you can do something about your relationship, but more importantly, something
about yourself. Whether it's getting your ex back and making up, or whether it’s moving
on to a different stage of your life, getting over a break-up is possible when you follow a
good plan of action.

Also, check out what TW Jackson has to say about dealing with a break-up in this video:

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